Husna Bokhari

“Can you share your Instagram handle so we can keep in touch?” I don’t have one.

The truth is, I once had Instagram—but only for about a month. I deleted it because it didn’t feel right for me. Currently, I only have Facebook, with no recent updates. I mostly use it to check the news or see friends’ posts. Most of my communication happens through WhatsApp, where I occasionally upload a status when I feel like it.

I remember my teenage years, especially during school, when I was surrounded by piles of books and didn’t yet own a smartphone. Life felt present. There was no pressure to constantly update others about my life. Everything changed drastically when I entered university—busy campus life, growing attachment to smartphones, and a slow shift in habits. I noticed I read fewer books for leisure, sticking mostly to compulsory academic reading, while my screen time increased.

Then COVID hit. The world felt paused. In that stillness, I slowly picked up my reading habit again. One of the first books I read was Ten Arguments for Deleting Your Social Media Accounts Right Now by Jaron Lanier. The title sounds extreme, but the book raised many valid points. That said, the book alone isn’t the reason I’m less active on social media today—it simply reinforced thoughts I already had.

During my Master’s studies in Belgium, I noticed something different. Many people around me—at least in my circle—didn’t rely heavily on social media. They didn’t constantly take photos to post online. My friends, especially my sisters from the mosque, were fully present when we gathered—eating, talking, laughing, enjoying the moment so deeply that we sometimes forgot to take any pictures at all. Around that time, I felt a strong desire to detox from social media, to focus inward, and to let go of the need to share life updates for validation. I post now only when I truly feel like it—mostly through WhatsApp.

Last week, while making breakfast, I stumbled upon a podcast by Dr. Tasneem from Yaqeen Institute entitiled ‘The social media spiral‘. I loved it! Almost every point she made resonated deeply with me. I also appreciated the host’s questions, which reflected the realities faced by a generation that grew up with social media as the norm.

The key takeaway for me was intentionality. Being mindful in digital spaces matters. Pausing before posting. Asking ourselves: Is this beneficial? Is this appropriate? Does it align with my values? For me, that also includes being conscious of modesty and haya’. Shyness and humility are qualities to be preserved, not eroded. As Muslims, we are responsible not only for our actions offline, but also for what we choose to put into the digital world.

Being present in a digital world is not about rejecting technology altogether—it’s about using it with awareness, purpose, and care.